Cristiano Ronaldo will not Leave Manchester United And the Simple Math that Proves It

July 4, 2008

Despite more ridiculous garbage coming out of Marca saying that Ronaldo, his mum and Abraham Lincoln are due for medicals at Real any minute now, I can assure all of you faithful readers that Cristiano Ronaldo is officially going nowhere. In many ways, the situation reminds me a lot of what`s happening in the states right now with the election- something that is quite obvious is being shied away from in an effort to make the situation look tenuous and seemingly poised on the head of a pin. Obama is way ahead of McCain (despite what CNN makes it look like) and Cristiano Ronaldo will not be playing in all white next year.

Simply mountain out of a molehill stuff and the reasons for Ronaldo not leaving are really quite obvious- money. Despite our debts, United have no real financial problems and our profits have never been quite so high. So, for us to sell Ronaldo for a world record 70 million means that we would likely have to go out and spend the entire thing on new players. Every team in the world knows that if United sold Ronaldo they would be flush with cash and desperate to land the signatures of top notch players before the end of the transfer window and thereby get ripped off hardcore. If we were looking for Schweinsteiger there would easily be an additional 8 or 9 million added on to his price just because clubs know we`ve got the money and we need the player. Supply dictates demand and we would be highly demanding something in finite supply and therefore we`d get ripped off. The Glaziers didn`t get as rich as they are by selling high and then buying higher.

And look at how Ronny`s supposed “I want to leave“ rhetoric has completely stopped since the Euro ended. Now that he isn`t constantly surrounded with foreign press (who seemingly hear what they want to hear) things have cooled right off and he`s even met with our medical staff. I predict that he will get surgery and return to the team in October or mid September.

It looks like all signs are pointing to Berbatov for our new signing. More on that to come.

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Why Cristiano Ronaldo’s Transfer Could Mean Schweinsteiger and Podolski are Manchester United Bound

June 25, 2008

I haven’t been able to post in a while as I’ve been busy working on an exciting new football blog project that will be launching in the next few weeks. I’ll be sure to bring you more details about that once the time is right. However, I figured I had to weigh in on the status of Cristiano Ronaldo’s seemingly unstoppable transfer to Real Madrid.

I’m not gonna shit on the guy as a player, I can’t belittle his contribution from last year and he is truly one of the world’s greatest players, if not the most exciting. However, if he really wants to alienate the fans, insult our manager and basically turn himself into a pariah during his exit; then he is more than entitled to do so. If we get a fair price for him (the 70 million pound vicinity sounds about right) then I’m more than happy to let him go. If he is willing to piss everybody off in this manner, then the guy must really want it. He could have stayed and become a United legend and truly one of the all-time greats, but it appears as though that doesn’t interest him. I am confident that I know the answer as to why.

He is supposedly now engaged to Nereida Gallardo and I am positive that she has her heart set on becoming one of Spain’s biggest celebrities and that will require Cristiano signing up as the newest, greatest Galactico. Face it, once he shacked up with her, his whole tone changed. Guys will do weird things if it means that they can bang a model on the regular.

If he stays he stays, if he goes he goes, but I would much rather see him leave than stick around and stink up the place or unsettle other members of the team. I am pretty sure that Fergie and the Glaziers have enough pride to not let Madrid get away with what they have been obviously trying to do. We don’t have to sell, Manchester United aren’t a selling club. But I say if he’s going to be a dick about it, then sell him and cash the hell in.

Lukas Podolski is being linked heavily with Tottenham. I think he is exactly the type of striker we’re looking to bring into the side and I wouldn’t be surprised if Fergie was busy in the background trying to make something happen. There hasn’t been a great deal of United transfer news since we missed out on Aaron ‘retard’ Ramsey and I think that may have something to do with Carlos Quieroz’s potential ascension to the Portugal job. I don’t think he will leave, but if he does I would immediately put a bet on Keano as next Man United manager.

Shweinsteiger is a football manager favourite and he will fill Ronaldo’s shoes ably. He is more of a traditional winger but possesses the eye for goal that our style of play requires. Him and Podolski would add some continental class to the United side and it is pretty obvious that they are both looking to GTFO of the Bundesliga ASAP.

If Ronaldo goes, we can fill his shoes with these two and be better off because of it. And I imagine we’ll likely have another 25 million or so kicking around in change. Maybe we could put that towards lowering ticket prices.


Transfer News: Aaron Ramsey Set to be Manchester United’s New Summer Signing

June 3, 2008

It seems as though this kid has been garnering praise and adulation for most of the season as England’s new stand-out youth player set to launch himself onto the world stage. As soon as the season ended the countdown was on and as you can see, Fergie & Co. have already jumped on the Cardiff teenager. There are rumors swirling that Arsenal have also had a bid accepted, but if Ramsey has any hopes of playing for the English national team, he knows that Old Trafford is the only real destination.

Since he’s being loaned back to Cardiff for next season, he will likely make his united debut in the 09/10 season (jesus that sounds futuristic). He’ll be taking to the field with Rooney, Ferdinand, Carrick and Hargreaves and this exposure to the upper echelons of English footballers will do wonders for the boys confidence and technical ability. Fergie’s system has churned out so many excellent young players, that a well-developed lad like Ramsey could very well be the jewel in Sir Alex’s cap upon retirement. I also think that Fergie’s trump card will be playing the Welsh card. Giggsy will likely be dispatched to convince the kid to sign on the dotted line. Ramsey is a Welshman and there aren’t many held in higher esteem that Welsh Wizard they call Giggsy.

There is a faint scent of Michael Owen about the place. I hope that we can wrap up the deal shortly. The kid would be retarded to go to Arsenal.


Cristiano Ronaldo Leaving Manchester United? Don’t Bet on It

June 2, 2008

The whole Ronaldo thing is really quite simple and there’s three different ways it’s going to get resolved. All of them depend on the motivation of why, exactly, Ronaldo is saying one thing to the English press and another to the Spanish. What this does demonstrate, just from the outset, is the fact that Ronaldo is a shrewd media operator. Not made in the affable “aw, shucks” mold of David Beckham, he is as calculating as any girl you’d see on the Hills.

A) He really does want to leave. If Ronaldo really does want to go, it’s because he thinks he’s accomplished all he can at Manchester United (prem title, league’s best player, Champs league). I think this is bogus because he’s really only had one truly outstanding season and we will find out next year whether this was a one-off or not. He may also want to leave because he thinks he’ s bigger than the club… And I personally don’t think even Cristiano’s narcissism is at that level… Yet.

B) He wants to stay, he just enjoys the attention. This is the one I’m hoping for. I have a feeling that a lot of the media coverage happens to be due to Euro 2008 starting this week and the Spanish and Portuguese press needing something exciting to talk about. He keeps them guessing by playing coy about everything and this may be a subtle way to segue into option C.

C) He wants more money. This is the most likely reason why he’s doing what he’s doing. Abd I can kind of see where he’s coming from with this one as, in his mind, he was being paid the same amount when he was a 15 goals a season man with a few assist here and there. Now he’s racked up almost 50 goals and become the league’s best player. While he is being handsomely rewarded as it is, he is likely looking to become the league’s highest paid player. And there is a legitimate argument for that.

I believe that Fergie is right to come out guns-blazing (or Glazing) when he insists that the team’s owners would happily sit Ronaldo in the stands rather than sell him to Real Madrid just because he wants to spend more time on the beach and become the Spanish Press’ favorite person for the next few months until some Spanish soap star falls off a balcony or gets addicted to coke and everybody forgets about C. Ronaldo and the unimpressive year he’s having adjusting to the monotony and crap that goes on in the Spanish league. I don’t think Real should be reported to UEFA, but I do think they are crossing the line a bit by using their proxies at the Marca to unsettle Cristiano and keep the media attention on him. If he wants to leave, I think it will take a cool 150 million pounds to force the move. I think the Glaziers are that stubborn. And good on them for that. A PLC would jump at the chance to sell Ronaldo for 70 million. The Glaziers simply don’t have to think that way, luckily enough for us United fans.


Transfer Rumor: Who Will Manchester United Sign In the Summer of 08? Robinho, Luis Fabiano or Klaas Jan Huntelaar?

May 29, 2008

Every summer that there’s a major international tournament, a large volume of transfer that normally wouldn’t go through turn into done deals quite quickly. This is compounded by the nearly 50 million pounds shelled out just in the past week or two on just three players- Jose Boswinga for Chelsea, Luka Modric at Spurs and Arsenal’s soon-to-sign Samir Nasri (who is supposed to be the business, but a bit of a diver).

For me, Man United should really be doing better to put Chelsea off from Robinho. I think he’d be a good addition to the side and he would give us that out and out finisher that we currently lack, along with the ability to fit into our fast-paced style of play. He also fits in with this Portuguese contingent that is being instilled in our squad. Robinho hasn’t really developed as an outstanding finisher in Spain, but I think he would be well-suited to the Premier League. Pace and tricks in abundance, I think he would be able to link up much better with our crew than the crap they’ve got going on down at Chelsea.

A lot of people are floating the idea of Luis Fabiano of Sevilla. While there is no doubting the Brazilian’s ability, he doesn’t have a demonstrated track record of success. His stays in French and Portuguese football were both nothing to write home about. However, when he was at Sao Paolo a few years ago he had a real tendency to get involved in scraps and brawls as he really seemed to enjoy winding up opponents. Might fit in well at Chelsea, but I think that he may detract from our style of play a bit. Either way, I’d like to see more of the guy. I would take Robinho over Fabiano though, at this point in time.

Klaas Jan Huntelaar remains a name perpetually linked with United. What else can you say about the Dutchmaster? A slick finisher and a real poacher of goals. He can run at a defense as well, but I can see Fergie wanting to start him off as an impact substitute and then somehow embedding him into the Rooney, Ronaldo and Tevez consortium. With three or four different contrasting styles of football running at a defense all at the same time I think we may very well have teams from up and down the English countryside cleaning Hershey-squirts out of their Nike shorts.

Either way, I expect only two signings this summer. One high-profile and the other an emerging player.
Euro 2008 could always offer up another heroic set of performances from players you’ve never heard of before.


Transfer Rumors: Who is Manchester United Looking to Sign During the 2008 Summer? Micah Richards, Michael Owen, Klaas Jan Huntelaar or Dimitar Berbatov?

May 12, 2008

With David Gill confirming to all media parties today that Fergie will be provided with whatever funds he needs to strengthen to squad, the time has come to start the silly stuff- transfer speculation. The Andrewisahater blog was founded on transfer speculation (and leaked jersey photos) so its something we take pretty seriously around here.

Last season saw us purchase a dearth of midfield talent alongside the rights to Carlos Tevez. This year, an out and out goalscorer and defensive reinforcements seem to be the immediate priority. Currently, the names being touted are all (relatively) proven commodities with the odd surprise thrown in along the way.

MICHAEL OWEN

To be honest, I think that Michael Owen is the oddest selection up there. Presumably we have already made a bid for him, and I know he’s keen for a move away from St. James Park. However, we would effectively be purchasing him as a replacement for Louis Saha- a striker who has seen his better days and is incredibly injury prone. Sound like somebody else you know? To be honest, I think Owen would likely be spending the entire season about two feet away from being ruled offside. Our team is about dropping deep, assuming positions and then executing precision movements. Owen seems somebody who is good at banging the ball into the net, but not much else. I am unconvinced that he would add an element to the team. However, if he was content to be used as an impact substitute, I think he may be worth a punt for under 10 million.

MICAH RICHARDS

I think that Richards is a long-term successor to Gary Neville and I think he would be the perfect compliment to Evra on the opposite flank. Both can get forward, score goals and create them; while offering up effective defending options at the same time. My only problem with the pursuit of Richards is that his appearance (and subsequent drop directly into the first team) would probably unsettle Wes Brown, who has been immense in the latter part of the season. His price tag will be high, but this player is quickly becoming an established England International and he would continue our tradition of fostering English talent. It would also put a smile on my face to snake Man City’s best player right out from under their noses.

KLAAS JAN HUNTELAAR

He has been linked with us for the past few summers and while the hideous Dutchman is a proven goal-threat, I am unsure whether he is up to our quality and whether he would actually compliment our existing squad. A different type of player to Rooney and Tevez, Huntelaar would offer some new options going forward, but I’m unconvinced at the end of the day about whether he would be worth the money.

DIMITAR BERBATOV

This guy will not be playing for Spurs next summer, that much is true. However, I’m also not sure whether he’ll wind up at Old Trafford or not. I don’t really know if, mentally and personality-wise, he would be able to fit in with the rest of the dressing room. He seems prone to sulking and disappearing acts, however, his goal threat can’t be underestimated. He is a classy player at his best and an irritating sod at his worst. I think he is a similar player to Anelka- somebody I am extremely happy we didn’t sign last year. Berbatov’s approach to goalscoring is effective, but I don’t know if it exudes the confidence and class that I expect from a Man U player.

Anyways, I’ll be sure to keep my eyes and ears peeled and if any movement happens, we will be among the first places to get it online. Guaranteed.


Manchester United’s 07/08 Season in Review (Up ’til this point)

March 25, 2008

Gentlemen,

It’s been a while, a long while, but due to work hecticness and assorted insanity, I was out of blogging commission for the better part of the season. Truth be told, I find that during the middle of the English Premier League season, there is such a saturation of coverage that it almost isn’t worth it to blog about all the highlights and details. However, after this past weekend, the horse race is definitely on- this could be the most exciting three months that United, the Premier League and quite possibly the Champions League have seen in ages.

Anyways, things are starting to heat up, since the last post (which was early September, I believe) United have come a long way, to say the least. In my opinion, the two key factors that have thus far defined United’s season are a) the early season injuries to Giggs, Scholes and Neville, b) Ronaldo and Rooney redefining their positions.

Early on, none of us expected Anderson and Nani to have much to do this season except possibly a loan deal to a continental side or a few substitution appearances interspersed with reserve team duty. Speaking from late March you can only say two words: fuck that. Giggsy and Scholesy have seen themselves upstaged and replaced by the pace, vision and trickery of Nani combined with the raw talent and guile exhibited by Olivera Anderson. While both youngsters are far from the finished product, they have shown themselves able deputies for the two aging superstars, who are enduring the final few days of their playing careers. While both Giggs and Scholes have contributed much to United’s success this season, the torch was passed earlier than expected with the two Portuguese speaking players coping much better than we all expected.

Anderson specifically should be singled out for praise, and while I admit he can sometimes be wasteful, he shows a steely resolve and an ability to read the game that you’d normally see in a player more than a decade his senior. I expected Anderson to be a creative attacking player, but perhaps that particular part of his game only worked in Portugal. His approach to the Premier League has been that of a box-to-box midfielder- able to break down opposing attacks (Anderson is so adept at harassing the other team’s central midfielders)  and then play wicked through balls to release Rooney, Ronaldo, or Tevez in the blink of an eye. Anderson needs to stop shooting on the volley and start keeping the ball on the ground, I would personally like to see him run at players more, but if he seems himself developing in the mode of a Keane or a Gattuso- I say good on him.

Nani as a much more attack-minded player and the old adage definitely applies that while he isn’t necessarily a great goal-scorer, he is a scorer of great goals. Witness the one he banged in against Liverpool over the weekend and you’ll know what I mean. He’s only gotten four on the season, but they’ve all been hum-fucking-dingers.

The absence of Gary Neville has also been telling, as Wesley Brown finally came into his own and proved that he was a quality player able to run with the big dogs. Now he just needs to sign his goddamn contract and we’ll be good.

The second part of my season in review is to address the explosive play of Cristiano Ronaldo.  Everybody agrees that Ronaldo is redefining the role of a winger and I personally think its short-sighted to mention that and not mention Rooney in the same sentence. A lot of people have said Rooney’s lack of goals this year prove that he is an average player similar to somebody like Dirk Kuyt. Nothing could be further from the truth.  What is happening here is something that would only come out of a system run by Alex Ferguson. Ronaldo is doing so well because he is a midfielder in the process of becoming a forward, while Rooney is playing well because he is a forward in the process of becoming a midfielder.

Look at Rooney’s performance in the match up against Liverpool this weekend, he set up both goals that weren’t from a corner with excellent off-the ball running and a creative range of passing. These are the characteristics of a world class midfielder. Rooney has always been a short battering-ram of a striker, and it worked very well for him in his early days because players simply didn’t know how to play against him. As opposition defences figured out Rooney’s style and learned how to stifle him, Rooney has upped the ante. This is how he differs from a player like Kuyt. Kuyt has gone from being mediocre up front to being mediocre on the left wing. Rooney has adapted to dropping deeper or leading the line and playing the role of provider instead of the finisher of attacking moves.

There have been many cases this season when Rooney would, in previous years, have fired a hopeful long shot at the keeper but instead he is now opting to play incredible passes into the direction of Tevez or Ronaldo and allow them to share in the spoils. Ronaldo would not have 34 goals this season if Rooney weren’t playing Cash to Ronaldo’s Tango.

And let’s face it, Ronaldo is a one-man gang sometimes. He is a proven match-winner and I can’t believe some people still slate him as over-rated. For my money, Ronaldo is the most exciting footballer in world and is the best attacking player in the Premier League. He will not be leaving United for some time as he is realizing that he won’t get more play or promotion anywhere else in the world. He is simply that good.

I also have to give hats off to the defensive duo of Ferdinand and Vidic, who have both remained healthy all year and I would genuinely put them up as the best central defensive pairing in the world. I firmly believe that the understanding between the two is something special with both players possessing power, pace and precision in abundance. Evra has been his fleet-footed self all season and he adds so much to our attack on the overlap. I think that over the course of his career, many people will see Evra as the natural successor to Roberto Carlos, except for one thing- Evra can actually defend.

If you were to ask me who should be sold this summer, I would have to give you two or three candidates right off the bat. While there is still time in the season and I could very well be eating my words later, I would say that Louis Saha and Michael Carrick should probably be off-loaded while we can still get a decent price for them. Saha is too injury prone and just looks off the pace right now. His first touch is gone and the runs he used to make are now easily picked off by opposing defenders or the keeper. He can’t cut it at this level and he has to go. Carrick on the other hand hasn’t played particularly terribly, he just doesn’t really get the job done for me. He really has only had one outstanding game for us (second game against Roma) and his range of passing just doesn’t hold up when you compare him to the quality of Nani, Anderson and Hargreaves. I think Fergie has given Carrick too much of a chance at Hargreaves expense, but I think that Fergie is trying to keep Owen fresh for a long Champions League campaign.

That is definitely one thing that we owe Fergie for. Our team has probably been the luckiest big four club thus far in terms of injuries. Whereas in other seasons long term injuries to Neville, Giggs and Scholes would have proved disastrous, Fergie’s summer spending spree has proved fruitful. I think Darren Fletcher and John O’Shea have long term futures at the club. I am on the fence about Park Ji-Sung, but at the end of the day, he’s a solid guy and always gives 110%. He looks really stoked when he scores too. I say keep him.

From now on, I’ll be blogging the England and Man U games for the rest of the season. I’ll be back with a new video format and who knows, you might even see some of my other projects starting to show up around here. Rumor has it that there is an andrewisahater English cricket blog coming up.

Until then, it’s good to be back. Make sure to check back on the regular as I’m going balls out on the blogging again.  Congratulations go out to Rio Ferdinand for being awarded the England captaincy. Should be worth watching. What happens if we hammer France? Something to chew on.